Ron White: (when asked who influenced him to get into the entertainment business) Who influenced me to get into comedy? That's kind of a weird question. I was influenced by a lot of comedians. I am a huge comedy fan and still have comedy CDs that are current and old. So, who influenced me? Pryor, Cosby, Kinison, Steve Martin, Cheech & Chong, Andy Griffith, Bob Newhart, Bill Hicks. I think if you listen to a lot of comedy, they all influence you. I don't emulate anybody, but I'm sure I'm influenced by everybody.
Ron White: (When asked if he remembered the first time he made someone laugh) I remember the first time I ever made somebody laugh. I was like 4 years old, and I told a knock-knock joke that I didn't get -- but it killed. I mean, it brought the living room down. I'm sure, at that age, all I knew was they laughed, and it was fun to make people laugh. Now, the first time I ever got a big laugh in public, I was at a theater watching The Blue Lagoon, which was a movie with Brooke Shields and some blonde good-looking kid. There's a scene where they're laying together, they're about to screw for the first time. And he goes, "I feel something funny down there," and she goes "Me, too." And I said, "Me, too!" and got a big laugh in the theater. That was the first time I ever got a huge laugh in public out of just pure timing. And then the rest is history.
Ron White: (When asked if he inherited his quick wit) Was that a question somebody wrote? "Did you inherit your quick wit?" How do they even know I have one? I'd have to say, if I have one, I did not inherit it. I don't know who in my family thinks very fast at all, including me. The things that people see me do onstage are written, so it doesn't have to be very quick if you have all day with a pen.
Ron White: (about being asked if he writes his own stuff) Every artist has some level of collaboration. I don't care who they are. As it turns out for most comedians, their friends are comedians. So if somebody says they write everything they do onstage, that's usually a lie. Because if I'm talking to somebody on the phone and they go, "Oh, I would have said it like this," or if they go, "Here's a tag for that," or if you're sitting around a condo, that's where stuff gets written. No, I don't write all my own stuff, but the majority of it.
Ron White: I want to start by asking a question, because I don't know the answer to it. Why does a pair of sunglasses cost more than a 24 inch color screen T.V.
Ron White: I believe that when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Then find someone whose life gives them vodka and have a party.
Ron White: Some friends of mine asked me if I wanted to go to a strip club, and I didn't... want to. 'Cause, back me up on this, fellas: once you've seen one woman naked, you... wanna see the rest of 'em naked.
Ron White: I believe that a bad Super Bowl halftime show is still better than a soccer game.
Ron White: I believe that if you're a convicted sex offender in this country, when you get out of prison, you should have to put a sign in your yard or on your door that says you're a convicted sex offender because I don't care about you're rights anymore. And I'd also like to know where to get one of those signs because I'd like to keep some kids out of my yard.
Ron White: Here's the Ron White heightened state of awareness system. It only has two heightened states of awareness. Go find a helmet. Put on the damn helmet.
A man actually died of a heart attack during one of Ron White's performances.
Ron White's stand-up comedy act, "You Can't Fix Stupid", attracted over 4.5 million viewers.
The city of Lincoln was considering fining Ron White $100 for smoking on stage.
Ron White is 6 foot 2 inches tall.
Ron White's "Drunk In Public" tour in 2004, ranked in the top fifty tours by Pollstar Magazine.
Ron White was voted the "Best Act of the Friday Night Gala" at the Just For Laughs Comedy Festival he appeared at in 2001.
Ron White was married to Barbra White, but they have since divorced.
Ron White has sold over 1.4 million copies of his dvd They Call Me Tater Salad.
Ron White calls his son, Marshal, "Tater Tot."
Ron White always wears black outfits while performing.
Ron White is the only member of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour that has not appeared on Blue Collar TV.
He coined the popular catch phrase "You can't fix stupid."
Ron recently wrote a book containing life stories and comedy acts entitled I Had the Right to Remain Silent... But I Didn't Have the Ability.
Ron's nickname is "Tater Salad"
Ron's comedy CDs include "Drunk in Public", "Truckstop Comedy", "Tater Salad: Busted in Des Moines".
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