A lot of celebrities, especially when you're talking about the really big ones, live in what I call the fame bubble. Nobody ever says no to them or challenges them or even teases them.
A lot of stars don't have a sense of humor.
But if something funny happens, I can't resist. I have to tell the people.
Food is my thing, I do not smoke or drink, so food is my vice.
Gwyneth Paltrow names her kid Apple. I'm not going to let that stand.
Have I gone too far?
I actually have to pick and chose stuff that I know I'm going to bomb at.
I also love Mole, the unsung hero of reality programming.
I am in love with Larry David.
I can be 5 feet from Christina Aguilera, for example - we've worked together many times - and she will not even look at me.
I can say whatever I want. So do not bring the kids. It's definitely rated R.
I change my material all the time.
I do road gigs occasionally but I don't want to go out on the road for months at a time.
I don't like doing movies, period. Movies are hard. I like TV.
I hate it, it is tedious... when I write for my act, it is very improvisational, I write bullet points, I cannot sit in front of a computer; that is not my style.
I have friends who are going through chemotherapy, and they make the darkest, most hideous cancer jokes you've ever heard.
I love dirt of all kinds. All dirt is clean. There's no such thing as filthy dirt.
I love Mariah Carey. Remember the breakdown? I loved the breakdown.
I love to make fun of fashion because it is just so silly.
I think a Celebrity Survivor would be great.
I'm also doing a special for Comedy Central called Autobiography. It's going to be a spoof of Biography.
I'm always listening and watching; my ear is like a boom mike. And judging, frankly. Constantly judging.
I'm basically always on tour.
I'm not always in that good with middle-aged heterosexual men.
I'm on every worst-dressed list imaginable.
If you see me on Friday, you'll see different material on Saturday night.
It was a nightmare having cameras in the house 10 hours a day for a month.
It's really big - I wanted a house where we would have plenty of room to spread out.
My act has always reflected what's going on in my life.
My act is based on my life.
No, I love Montreal... I think I love Montreal more than Montreal loves me... I love the food there.
So I wonder if anything should ever be off limits.
So yes, I say things I regret constantly, and I just can't help it.
That's life when you're on the D-list.
That's what I loved about Temptation Island. I don't even know why they did it.
The beauty about the D-list is that people who are on it probably don't know they are.
The fact that that really is my life, and that my husband Matt - who you see on the show - is like the most normal guy in the world.
The thing that bums me out about The Real World is I don't want to believe that teenagers are that stupid.
The thing that cracks me up is how these reality characters start out thrilled and excited just to be on television, and how they move to thinking they are as big as the Friends.
There are lots of little mom and pop furniture stores in L.A., which is perfect for me because I like to mix the old with the new.
Well, I'm obsessed with my dogs.
Well, my whole thing with gossip is I couldn't care less if it's true.
Kathy invited her niece and nephew to her house for a weekend on her reality show on Bravo, My Life On The D-List, and as a surprise for her niece, she had Talan from Laguna Beach pay a visit.
Kathy's favorite male comedians are: Howard Stern, Jerry Seinfeld, & Bill Maher.
Kathy chats live with her fans on-line, answering their questions, and talking about what's going on with her life. She also calls these people at home, to talk with them personally on the telephone, because as a kid she would fantasize about receiving a call from a famous star. She thinks it's really fun, and a great way to meet new people.
Kathy's favorite book is anything by Anne Tyler, favorite dinner is at the Homesick Restaurant, color is blue, because she likes to stare at any body of water longer than any crazy person would. Her favorite movie is The Dead Zone, she loves the character of Johnny smith, it was Christopher Walken pre-crazy.
Kathy visited Sgt. Tom Adkins, who had survived an explosion that had killed his fiance and friend the day before, during her 'Iraq' episode. She has kept in touch with him through E-mails, and laughs at the way that he signs each goodbye: 'Don't sweat the petty things, pet the sweaty things'.
Kathy has written guest articles for Glamour, and Pulse magazines.
Kathy used E-bay to auction off, for Hurricane Katrina charities, the chance to accompany her to Las Vegas, in 2006.
Kathy is now spending tens of thousands of dollars to educate the public about the side effects of Lasik eye surgery.
Kathy has had five surgeries on her right eye, three were Lasik surgeries, and one was an attempt at corrective surgery by Dr. Maloney. Her last procedure was a 90 minute surgery, that left her with 17 stitches in her eye for three weeks.
Kathy used to have her husband Matt stand out in the lobby before and after her stand-up shows, to sell her comedy DVD's.
Kathy received red roses from Renee Zellwegger after mentioning her in a stand-up routine in an unflattering way.
Kathy's television resume started with guest spots on the NBC hit drama ER, and ABC's Seinfeld where she created the role of Sally Weaver, a comedienne who insists that Jerry is the Devil.
Kathy's maid-of honor at her wedding was Brooke Shields, who decorated the Bride's room with hundreds of rose petals.
Kathy is banned from appearing on the Ellen degeneres show, for her constant bashing of celebrities, Ellen says that her audience is 'friendlier than that'.
Kathy's reality show on Bravo, My Life On The D-List was nominated for an Emmy award in 2006.
When she first started doing stand-up comedy, Kathy got some advice from comedian Phil Hartman after she saw one of his gigs and they talked for about 20 minutes.
Kathy's dog was hit by a car and killed in early 2006.
When NBC's Jeff Zucker passed on Kathy's sitcom pitch, The D-List, which would have been semi-based on her life as a semifamous celebrity, Kathy developed the idea into a reality show, which Bravo quickly bought. The series, now entitled Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List, is set to air its second season in the summer of 2006.
In late 2005, Kathy was ousted from E!'s red carpet coverage, which instead decided to replace Kathy with American Idol's Ryan Seacrest. Of the decision, Kathy stated, "Apparently, [E! president] Ted [Harbert] told my reps that the E! red carpet is a puzzle and I am a piece of the puzzle… but I don't fit this particular puzzle."
Before making it as a comedienne, Kathy worked as a waitress, hostess, and...baby furniture saleswoman.
Kathy has an enormous gay following, who religiously come to see her shows. Kathy thinks that gay people are more likely to enjoy her comedy because they are not easily offended by her swearing and sometimes raunchy jokes.
Kathy has spoken outwardly about her bouts with plastic surgery, having her hair dyed red and chemically straightened, her brow lifted, her nose done, her face "peeled", her body liposuctioned, and her teeth veneered. In fact, Kathy has made several jokes about her plastic surgery fetish. And despite the liposuction, Kathy still thinks that she looks like, in her words, "a big fat cow."
In 2003, Kathy won the first edition of the reality series Celebrity Mole. She later continued with her obsession with reality TV, endorsing it in TV Guide, hosting Average Joe, hosting Bravo's Ultimate Reality Reunion in 2005, and even letting the cameras in on her own life with Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List.
In September of 2005, Griffin filed for divorce from husband Matthew Moline, featured prominently on her Bravo reality series My Life on the D-List, seeking "irreconcilable differences."
Kathy has hosted the Billboard Music Awards three times - in 1998, 1999, and 2000. During the 2000 show, she co-hosted with the five men of N'Sync and throughout the night, she made out with Lance Bass and handcuffed herself to Justin Timberlake in order to anger Britney Spears.
In February of 2001, Kathy married computer technician Matthew Moline.
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