A lot of good love can happen in ten years.
And live now. Because this is all there is. And enjoy now like a child. And be your authentic self.
And you can't help who you love.
At the Comedy Store I started to get known doing impressions and stopped doing that because I saw where it was leading and so because I did that I was able to excel to another level without being known as the comic impressionist.
Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
But it was so good because it made me comfortable with the creative process - with being on a limb, you know? And I've been there ever since.
But, in retrospect, it always seems to work out that you can look back on something that was a disaster and find some gems in there.
But, you know, you can't be a star at home.
Desperation is a necessary ingredient to learning anything, or creating anything. Period. If you ain't desperate at some point, you ain't interesting.
Each of us has a spark that identifies who you are as a person. Even if I'm not as popular as I might be playing the same character, I'll find a way to get into new and challenging areas.
Either you're the one erasing or you're the one being erased.
Everything in my life has happened for a good reason. When I'm on the beam man the blessings just come one after another like rain.
I also wanted to express a lot of old hurts past and things like that. And what ended up happening, and I'm really glad, is that it became like a love letter. So, I was saved from myself. A love letter to everyone I've loved.
I believed in that Divine spark. It's not what I say or what I do - it's why people want to hang out with me. I wanted to put that in the movie. There have been times when I've forgotten about it.
I don't feel any pressure to be funny at all. I'm funny because I want to be funny. I could sit here and be serious for an hour and you would go away and make me much funnier than I am.
I don't think human beings learn anything without desperation. Desperation is a necessary ingredient to learning anything or creating anything. Period. If you ain't desperate at some point, you ain't interesting.
I don't think you can know God unless you're passionate about him so you're either screaming at him, enraptured with the idea of being around him or feeling him in your life.
I get excited when I'm gonna be surrounded by people who make me better and make me stay on my game and challenge me, so she's wonderful to watch, unbelievable.
I have been the guy who has everything but yet is so one-track minded about what I want on that I can't see my blessings.
I just want to be myself.
I love playing ego and insecurity combined.
I really believe in the philosophy that you create your own universe. I'm just trying to create a good one for myself.
I really want to love somebody. I do. I just don't know if it's possible forever and ever.
I think it's important never to look a gift horse in the mouth and never to overlook your talents, what you're good at and so I really say it sounds like a great creative challenge to me. It doesn't matter whether it's dramatic or comedic.
I think we all try to stand up for things we believe in. Truth and honesty were ingrained in me by my parents.
I want to be the greatest actor that ever lived, frankly. I'd love that. But I don't need to be. I just want to be here. That's it.
I was on Prozac for a long time. It may have helped me out of a jam for a little bit, but people stay on it forever. I had to get off at a certain point because I realized that, you know, everything's just OK.
I'm the first to admit this whole salary thing is getting out of control. In the final analysis, it's still about the work.
I'm very serious about no alcohol, no drugs. Life is too beautiful.
I've always concentrated on the work and I don't know what happens all around that stuff like who gets the picture on the wall, who puts you on the shelf that suits you.
I've arrived at the place if I'm not taking a career risk, I'm not happy. If I'm scared, then I know I'm being challenged.
I've decided to be there. I only act in the movies.
I've had incredible blessings, unbelievable fortitude and at the same time there's always a balancing factor to my life and generally what it is, you pick up the book on comedians and I'm not in it.
If I'm alright myself, if I'm alright with God and doing the right things with my life - it's incredible. The monsoon of blessings that come to me. I've been so lucky. I've had so many miracles in my life that it's incredible.
If you aren't in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.
If you've got a talent, protect it.
Maybe other people will try to limit me but I don't limit myself.
Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they're eating sandwiches.
Morgan Freeman is so class. He's so cool. He's so scary.
My career it's like whatever, whenever, if it comes it comes, if it doesn't it doesn't. I don't sweat it.
My family kinda hit the skids. We were experiencing poverty at that point. We all got a job, where the whole family had to work as security guards and janitors. And I just got angry.
My interpretation to the secret to life is don't do anything or try not to do anything that makes you feel like you deserve to lose in life. And be grateful for what you have.And protect what you've got that's beautiful too.
Originality is really important.
People expect these days, everybody expects that fairytale. You're going to be together forever with somebody. I don't really subscribe to that.
People need motivation to do anything. I don't think human beings learn anything without desperation.
Some nights it was a melee, literally, where I'd be standing trying to defend myself for what I was doing. People would be screaming at me to do my old act, and getting actually violent and angry at me.
Ten years is a good thing with somebody. It's a nice thing.
That's the trouble with being me. At this point, nobody gives a damn what my problem is. I could literally have a tumor on the side of my head and they'd be like, 'Yeah, big deal. I'd eat a tumor every morning for the kinda money you're pulling down.'
There are peaks, there are valleys. But they're all kind of carved and smoothed out, and it feels like a low level of despair you live in. Where you're not getting any answers, but you're living OK. And you can smile at the office. You know? But it's a low level of despair. You know?
Well, I get excited when the people I work with scare me.
Jim hosted a special holiday party to benefit the Los Angeles Fire Department's 'Spark Of Love' toy drive. He escorted his 19 year old daughter Jane, girlfriend Jenny McCarthy, and her 4 year old son Evan. 500 guests arrived, donating over a thousand toys for needy area children, from guests including: Ron Howard, Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes, Billy Corgan, Cuba Gooding Jr., Morgan Freeman, and Pauley Shore. Professional skaters Surya Bonaly and Sasha Cohen performed on ice.
Jim has been dating Jenny McCarthy since July of 2005, and have no plans to ever get married, both believe that they don't need a piece of paper to be in love. They plan to fashion their relationship after Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell, happily Un-married.
Jim was down on his luck, and wrote himself a check for ten million dollars and post-dated it for Thanksgiving day, 1995. The visualization worked just in time, just three days before his father's death, Jim was offered ten million dollars for appearing in The Mask 2. His father was absolutely delighted. Jim placed the original check in his father's breast pocket before they closed the coffin.
Jim started making good money in Los Angeles, kicking his career off with a television show and two movies, so he sent for his parents in Toronto to move them to Los Angeles. Unfortunately, things fell through for Jim, his movies were failures and The Duck Factory was cancelled after thirteen shows. Money ran out, and his parents didn't help, they smoked and watched television all day. A depressed Jim started to paint a portrait of his father with a stopwatch in one hand and a gun in the other, calling it 'Waiting Around To Die'. He eventually did the hardest thing he ever had to do, and sent them back to Toronto.
Jim's hero is James Stewart, and he got to meet him in the late 1980s, he was so excited to see him in person, that he made a fool out of himself.
Jim's father Percy lost his job when Jim was in the 9th grade, forcing them to sell their house and relocate to Scarborough, where the whole family took on jobs at the Titan Wheels factory as janitors or security guards. Jim would work a 8 hour shift directly after school, scrubbing toilets and floors. At one point, the family all lived in their VW Camper Van.
Jim tried to get a book of his poems published at age ten.
Jim loved Christmas as kid, because visiting relatives increased his audience. He obsessively studied television shows, perfecting impressions of the stars and his alcoholic grandfather.
Jim attended a private concert by the band Phish in Careystock Vermont with his production crew from Me, Myself and Irene at the lead singer's home in June of 1999. Jim joined the band to sing 'Hey You' and 'Come Together'.
Jim's father Percy died of lung Cancer and complications from Alzeimer's Disease in 1994. His mother Kathleen died of kidney failure in 1991.
Jim again showcased his animated cartoon-like features in Ron Howard's depiction of the Christmas classic Dr. Seuss' How The Grinch Stole Christmas in 2000.
Jim suffered neck injuries while recreating the scene in Man On The Moon in which Kauffman gets in the ring with professional wrestler Jerry Lawlor.
Jim's fans were surprised by his choice of a darker role in the Ben Stiller dark comedy The Cable Guy. Jim plays a lonely man named Chip Douglas, posing as a television cable guy, who latches on to Matthew Broderick's character as a new best friend.
Jim's succes with the original Ace Ventura: Pet Detective garnered a sequel in 1995, Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls, that doubled the opening weekend figures, pulling in 40 million dollars on the debut alone.
Jim filmed The Mask right after his hit Ace Ventura: Pet Detective in 1994, and it made over 20 million dollars on its opening weekend alone. His role as an everyday type of guy who finds a magical mask that turns him into an over-the-top Cassanova/cartoon superhero shows off his animated 'rubber faced' form of comedy.
Jim took the lead in 1994, in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective in a role that showcased his over the top physical and verbal humor.
Jim married his Dumb and Dumber co-star and love interest Lauren Holly on September 23, 1996 and the couple divorced on July 29, 1997, citing irreconcilable differences.
Jim headed back to Canada in 1981 after his stint in Vegas opening for Rodney Dangerfield fell flat. It was then that he tried his hand at a made for television movie about a struggling stand-up comedian in Rubberface.
Jim began performing on stage at age 15, at the comedy club 'Yuk Yuks' in Toronto, encouraged by his father.
Jim's $20 million paycheck for The Cable Guy was the highest salary yet paid to a comedian.
Jim played 'Count Olaf' in Lemony Snicket's a Series of Unfortunate Events.
He was going to play Willy Wonka but they took about 14 months to tell him he got the part, then it was too late as he was doing Fun with Dick and Jane.
Jim was chosen by People magazine as one of the '50 Most Beautiful People in the World'. [1997]
He wrote Ace Ventura: Pet Detective movie along with 2 other people.
Had everybody surprised when he did The Truman Show, because it was a drama.
He dropped out of high school at 16, to work for comedy clubs.
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